Even though treatment is over, it's going to take me a while to get back to my-healthy-self. I am so weak that I could barely get out of bed this morning. My white cells are pretty low and I need to spend the next several weeks recovering and building myself back up. I spend most of the day today in the hospital getting hydration, medicine and sleep. I was also in the hospital earlier this week with yet again strong chest pains - turns out I am allergic to the 5FU chemo. It's very uncommon for someone to be allergic to 5FU, but I am. Thankfully, my doctor feels I have had enough of the chemo to work it's magic combined with the radiation.
I am seeing my doctors on Monday afternoon to discuss next steps. My first thought, "Did it work?" There is a 90% cure rate with this type and stage of cancer, so I am very positive that it all worked, but it's the doubt and "what if" that lingers over you until you know for sure. There will be several tests to see if the treatment actually worked. I did see my surgeon that removed the tumor and he inspected the area and the tumor did not regrow, which is a great thing, and everything is healing nicely. So all good things.
Hopefully the worst is over, it's just rebuilding and recuperating. Mentally, I am a different person than I was prior to treatment. I feel more, I care more, I want to give more, I want to accomplish more, I want to take more time to enjoy life. Physically, I am weaker - but I know me and I will come back physically better than ever. Watch out world!
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